Realisation

It has been a full week since my convocation; the day I finally graduated from university - officially. It's insane how fast the past three years have gone by.. It's also insane how I feel so undeserving.

I have put in a lot of effort and time towards attaining my degree but because I know that all that said effort was not my best, I feel like I deserve none of this. It surely doesn't help that my relatives are congratulating me over social media - I feel like I deserve less. All I can think about is how I didn't work hard enough, the numerous times I fucked up.. and how much more I could have done.

And now, I'm still unemployed. I believe that I have a rough idea of what kind of career I'd fancy, but I feel so tied to what my parents believe is the best thing for me: working in a corporate office for a multinational company. Good pay, good benefits, good career advancements. Doesn't sound too shabby, though it worries me how unexcited I am when I think about such jobs.. Don't people say you have to love what you do?